Confidence on Your Own Terms

When we picture a “confident leader,” the image is often loud, fast-talking, and always certain. But many of the most respected women leaders don’t lead that way at all.

Their confidence shows up as clarity, calm decision-making, and the willingness to speak when it matters—not perform confidence for the room.

This week is about redefining confidence on your own terms.

Reframe: Confidence Isn’t a Personality Trait

Confidence is not about:

• Being the loudest voice

• Having the quickest answer

• Never doubting yourself

It’s about communicating your thinking clearly and standing behind it.

When you stop trying to sound like someone else, your influence grows.

Scenario #1 Sharing Your Perspective in a Meeting

Instead of:“I’m not totally sure if this makes sense, but maybe we could…”

Try:“Here’s the perspective I’m seeing from the client side.”

Why it works: You remove unnecessary disclaimers and speak from expertise.

Scenario #2: Taking Time to Think

Instead of:Rushing into an answer

Try:“That’s a great question. Let me think about the best way to approach that.”

Why it works: Thoughtfulness signals credibility, not weakness.

Scenario #3: Offering a Recommendation

Instead of:“I just wanted to share an idea…”

Try: "My recommendation would be to focus on X first because it addresses the biggest risk.”

Why it works: You shift from contributor to decision influencer.

A Different Way to Measure Confidence

Confidence isn’t about how you feel before speaking.

It’s about whether you:

• Share your perspective

• Ask thoughtful questions

• Stand behind your expertise

• Communicate clearly when it matters

Those behaviors build real credibility.

You don’t have to change your personality to be seen as confident.

You simply have to communicate your thinking with clarity and intention. Join us at She Speaks Saturday March 28th.

Warmly,

Marie Book